Long days and reminders

So today was a little longer than I had thought it would be. First day four has been the same as the other days. No messages. Why not message them? I’m following the “great advice” of the experts. They say that if you message first that you look desperate and attract the wrong kinds of advances. Be more feminine and wait for them. If you message first, you come off as aggressive. We’ve all heard it. So, I’m avoiding messaging anyone. The whole point of this is to do things their way because of their “proven results”. One thing I did note was that they say it can take a minimum of six months before the dating sites “actually work”. Okay so I’m supposed to sit around, be a feminine woman and not message anyone, hope that someone will message me based on my pictures and profile, and market myself better than anyone else. To me it sounds like I have a better chance of setting myself on fire than anything. One guy decided nearly a month ago that he would just invite me to go fishing with him. Right then and there. No matter if I may have plans (I did since it was my birthday, but didn’t tell him that.) or anything else. I finally said that I had plans and never heard from him since. I even messaged him to apologize for declining. I got a two-word message back, “it’s okay” and then never heard from him again. So, because I didn’t go to a strange place most likely out in nowhere to fish with you I’m not worth anything? What really amused me is he hadn’t even read my profile even though I had read his. If he had, then he would have seen the part where I said that a first date when planned would be somewhere PUBLIC. I actually had a fellow suggest a hotel room for a first date, saying that it wasn’t for sex, but it us spending the night in a hotel room was the perfect place to “get to know each other”. He got rather upset with me when I turned him down. He didn’t realize that the fact even suggesting a hotel room for first date was CREEPY. These are the same guys that will whine and cry that women reject them and are all bitches for doing so. Guys, please take a moment and use some common sense.

Those are just a fraction of what I’ve dealt with. It’s been the sexual ones that really are a BIG turnoff and they don’t understand why. Well, let’s look at it this way. When the first thing you bring out is sex, then I can tell that you already don’t respect me or bother want to know me. You just want a notch for your headboard. You have already shown me that you didn’t read my profile and really probably barely saw my pictures and thought that I’m the one that will just roll over in bed for you because you’re a ‘nice guy’ and deserve it. Unfortunately, you’ve shown your true colors and I’m not digging them. These are the are the very same ones that nearly shout that they’re looking for a LTR and won’t accept anything less. Huh?

The scammers are the easiest ones to pick out for me. Ladies, please don’t fall for these guys. So, here’s what I learned about them. You both have nothing in common, not one single thing but they LOVE you. Within a week or two. They don’t care that they barely know you, they just feel so strongly for you that they can’t go a day without you. Stop talking/texting them for a few days and they’ll send some sappy thing to you. Within about I would say three weeks, they are asking for money, iTunes cards (this is new apparently), or they have some story about why they need something from you. The minute they ask for money, RUN! Do not walk away. RUN! That’s a key hint that they just want money and they’ll get as much as they can from you. What truly pisses me off about these guys is a vast majority of them pretend to be military. I have a lot of military in my family. I’ve had friends in the military. Trust me, most of them are happily married and don’t normally use dating sites. If you’re not sure or the story sounds even a little bit hokey, it is. They prey off the lonely and while some will do it to men, the main things they look for are lonely women. Don’t buy into it. There’s ways to learn about them and if they’re real or not. Do your homework.

I did work today and well the one good thing is that I’ve added two more days to my week. Sitting and figuring my bills out, I should be caught up soon. That’s a bonus. Though I will say that after I’m finally caught up most of it will sit in the bank. Why? Well there isn’t anywhere to go or that I want to go. Well maybe the occasional weekly dinner with the kids but that’s about it. There isn’t much that I want to do. It’s been a running gag since I moved here that every time I’ve made plans they will always fall through. So, I’m not really planning anything. I do want to go to the Ren Fest in Atlanta but let’s be honest I’m not holding my breath. The kids want to go too. Let me stress when I say ‘The Kids’ this means my son in law and my daughter. This would mean a hotel room for 2 nights. This means paying for tickets and food. Gas to get there and back. Back to what I’ve said about a woman traveling alone and use hotel guy as my point of reference. Although I’m fairly sure the kids would be off doing their own thing while I’m left to my own. I’ll figure something out I guess. Making plans? Not doing it since they keep falling through.

One thing I will admit is that I hate my breaks/meals. I do enjoy getting to smoke, that’s one redeeming quality. Though with the lack of friends that I’ve found that I have (like zero), I’m finding them boring. No one to talk to to pass the time. So, I end up sitting there thinking more and it gets dangerous. I found myself nearly at one point nearly calling the Lion because at one time that’s what I used to do and it’s hard to break long standing habits. I don’t have friends anymore. Not ones that bother with me. I used to be able to call friends on breaks to enjoy myself and pass the time. Instead I just toss my phone back in my pocket and stare blankly. It reminds me how isolated my life really is. While it can be depressing that I realize that I have no friends and honestly didn’t in the past, I have come to accept this as well. It’s interesting that I have some people on Facebook but I wouldn’t really call them friends. I don’t talk to them and honestly I have nothing to talk about with them. Some are the Lion’s family and he made it clear that talking to his family would be taken as obsessive. That he didn’t appreciate that his family remains as friends on Facebook. That I should be a complete asshole and remove them from my Facebook to spare him shame. This was actually something he had demanded of me. Of course, I obviously refused. The rest? I barely exchange words with any of them. The controlling friends that I had, they decided in their infinite wisdom because I didn’t do what they told me or expected of me, instead of being understanding or anything that it was for the best they just act like I don’t exist. Wasn’t that nice of them? All in all it’s been a rather long day. Tomorrow/today looks to be just as long. Guess I should try that sleep thing and get rested.

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