Thinking

Laying on the couch thinking. Have you ever had so much on your mind you don’t even really know what your thinking about. That’s how I feel right now. To be honest I don’t even know what to write but i’m just letting my fingers flow through it.  About 9 more weeks till I graduate high school, i’m excited. I’ll finally be able to pick up my acting career without high School in my way. I feel like acting is one of the only really good things for me. Can’t wait to see where it takes me. 

I recently broke up with my boyfriend, we were going out for about 2 years. I just felt it was time for us to split. I loved him don’t get me wrong but after what he pulled two years ago I just really couldn’t bring my self to trust him again. He had sex with another girl right in front of me. I don’t know what either of them were thinking, I just know it was pretty damn heart breaking and I was really hurt. Couldn’t really bring myself to trust him after that. I tried, he was just so mean to me, he said he loved me but it was hard to believe cause he didn’t really show it. I know people have different ways of showing love but right now I think it’s better i’m not with anyone. Gotta learn to love yourself completely before anyone else. 

I have met some really awesome people this last week. Just talkin to them has taken my mind off a lot. More like kept my mind busy. I still feel a faint dull pain in the back of my being, but for now I’m just try to stay as far away from it as possible. Which I know is bad because eventually I know I will explode. But let’s see how long I can last. Hopefully awhile. Until then I’m just gonna take advantage of the way i’m feeling now so I can continue to get things done. 

I might write about some of my memories on here to, A lot of my friends love hearing my stories they call it story time and really look forward to it. So maybe if I’m thinking about something that happened in my past I’ll just quickly write it down.

That’s enough writing for me right now I gotta finish the rest of my Algebra.

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