Today I am going to do better. I am going to get out and walk my miles this morning and I’m not going to sit on the couch all day. I am not going to watch TV all day. I am going to be active and do things to take care of myself- like exercise and drink water. Many times when my kids were little and I had a husband and a house to take care of, I said that college girls that were fat really had no excuse since all they had to do was take care of themselves. Now I am in that same situation. I have no one to take care of but myself. I have to make myself my job- my priority. When I look better, I feel better. I hate being fat. I really do. I have to do something about it. The food is the hard part because I don’t like anything that is good for me. I have got to figure out something I can eat. If my DOE job gets lined out, I will have a great place to work.
I am going to keep trying. I am not going to give up. Right now, I still have hope that things will/can work out for me. I need to keep trying until I am out of money and out of options.
Later, that same day…
I have gotten in my 10K steps and it’s 2:38. I walked a little less than 4 miles this morning. I cleaned the apartment really well when I got back. I have finished 2 16 oz glasses of water, and I’m working on my third. Jesus. There is really no excuse for not drinking water. How hard is that? I just have to be mindful of it and make myself do it. I’m hungry right now, but I’m not going to eat. I just have to get out of the habit of eating all the time. At 5, I will have something and that will be it for the day.
I was thinking something that I should start doing is one thing each day in each category: 1. good for my body, 2. good for my brain 3. good for my wellbeing. I know I have the TV on way too much, but it helps with the loneliness. When it’s quiet, I feel so much more alone.