Someday it will get to the point where I can only express myself with memes.
The only way I can express my current feelings toward my physics grade is that meme of the stock photo man shrugging with the caption “guess I’ll die.”
If I don’t make at least a 96.5 for this six weeks, I won’t be able to get a 90 in the class. And a B+ in your unweighted GPA makes everything go to shit and crash and burn.
I really want to fucking kill myself. How am I supposed to make a 96.5 in a class that I struggled to make a 90 average in last semester? I’m going to die. My average is a 73 now. Please just kill me.
Today there were thunderstorms. The power flickered and blacked out for short intervals. It was cool. I wish the power had just gone out during school hours so we wouldn’t have had to do anything.
I have a team programming project to think and stress about. I hate team projects with people I don’t know. My teammates are nice–two very tech-minded guys–but I feel very useless. I really hope I can pull my weight and actually be helpful.
Mariah Carey is a queen. That voice–Speechless.
I really hate myself for not getting science. I can’t fucking science. I can math and read and write and account and write computer programs and memorize things, but I cannot science. Why?
Fuck my life if I get a lousy 3.93 unweighted average because of a single bad physics grade. I hate myself. I really hate myself. Everything else is an A or A+, but this one B will ruin every fucking thing. I hate it so much.
I’m gradually going to replace my identity with sarcasm, self-deprecating humor, and memes.
What’ll I do when I fail to get a high average?
Guess I’ll die.
And yes, this is important, so please do not tell me it won’t matter in the long run. Of course it matters. Everything does. Especially when you’re a dumbass like me and you have nothing else going for you but your grades so you need to have really really good ones.