The beginning

I’m new to all of this, to be honest. I have a physical journal at my bedside, but I thought maybe it’d be a good idea to keep an online journal as well. Hell, maybe even get some help if I need it. Well, here I go.


Typical problem. I like a girl. This said girl is one that I’ve dated before, years ago. I’ve never shaken feelings of her off of me, even after giving the dating game another try. Ever since we met, I’ve just felt something, a connection that seemed more than just a high school crush. We’ve kept in contact over the years and have helped each other out with personal problems. (My problems, more than hers. I’m quite sensitive, it seems, and misery loves my company.) Well, we just met up again after a year long communication hiatus. I was an anxious wreck when we met again, as I have an anxiety disorder. Of course, she was kind enough to help me calm down, and knew that my hypoglycemic ass hadn’t eaten due to anxiety, so she had me eat something. She’s used to it. Starting to see why I like her, still? Anyway, long story short, we spent the day together, and everything about her that I loved back then is still there, and more. She’s grown smarter and even more mature, and she still makes me laugh and is so responsible. Jeez, look at me ramble, again. Anyhow, at the end of the day, I ended up planting a kiss on her cheek, which she returned with a kiss on the lips. If I hadn’t fallen back in love before, right then, I basically fell off of a sky scrapper into solid “feels” concrete. Unfortunately, she’s going through trying times, so dating might not be the first thing on her mind, understandably, but I doubt that kiss meant nothing. I’m going to try my hardest to take this chance to prove that she’s not the only one who’s done some growing, and that I’m​ going to be the person that supports her and loves her the right way.


In other news… I’m sick as a dog. This damn fever suddenly came over me after Easter dinner, and boy has it been kicking my ass. It’s assisted me in procrastinating my end of the term assignments, which isn’t good, considering they’re due tomorrow. I’ll live, of course, but what strange timing for these events to just line up.

Oh well. If you’re reading this, thanks for your time and possible patience. I’m going to attempt to catch some “Z’s” and hopefully make a habit on updating this semi-regularly.


– J

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