Cancel the wedding reception or no?

This has been the toughest couple of weeks of my life! I got married! 17 days ago and today we cancelled the honeymoon…. let me back up, planned to get married in September but since we were going to Vegas today a couple weeks ago started thinking maybe we should do it there but 2 weeks before Vegas we were gonna be in ft Myers beach (in 5 days) so thought let’s do it there on the beach then make vegas the honeymoon and have a reception in the backyard in June. So that’s what we ended up deciding…. so the day before we left for ft Myers he decided he needed a night out with the guys which ended in disaster so we weren’t gonna do it ft Myers but we still going becuse of the kids…. I didn’t bring my dress or anything but apparently he snuck them in the car. So on the way he asked me to please keep the plan so I agreed, yea I was mad about the night before but not to the point I really didn’t wanna marry him. So we did it and it was amazing and beautiful and I felt like the luckiest gal in the world! We hung out all evening after and drank a lot got into a huge fight where I slept in my car on my wedding night! Got up the next morning and we drove home! I tried to get the lady not to send the wedding certificate into the state because I immediately regretted doing it…. fast forward, it’s been a up and down couple of weeks since we’ve gotten home and I’m just not good at being a wife! We had an issue yesterday (my fault and was stupid)  which escalated till today and he was up and down about if he was going to Vegas with me, I said some shit I shouldn’t have but I was just so upset so anyways I cancelled the flight and they had one for tomorrow morning which I switched to just in case…. we talked worked it out had sex went fishing ( on the way I told him it wasn’t completely cancelled and we could go tomorrow morning so he said he was thinking about it) went to eat and took a nap. Once we woke I asked if we could go because I needed to call and cancel if not going and cancel the room- he refused to go so of course I cancelled it all…. so now here is where I’m stuck- the wedding night was a disaster and the honeymoon is too so do we even continue with the planning of the reception???? I’ve got all invites wrote out but only delivered 5 so far so do I cancel and tell the 5 we just can’t do it now or do I go through with it? Honestly I just wanna crawl in a hole and never come out! I surely don’t wanna celebrate something that has been a disaster from the git go- I hate the way my life has been since the day before we left for Florida! I’ve been very depressed and acting on emotions and not using my brain lately! I’ve looked it up and there is actually nuptial depression is a real thing…. maybe that’s what is going on, I love this man with my whole heart but man oh man at the rate we’re going and so up and down we won’t last like this! Any advice would be helpful! 

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