Day full of sleep and possibly self pity

So today I literally slept all day, until about two hours before I had to go to work. 
It felt great because I haven’t been able to sleep well at all since my dog was killed. 
The sting is just starting to go away, but it’s always still in my mind. 
I mean, we were at my mother in laws cleaning and went outside where Blue’s old dog house was… that he couldn’t even get into because my mother in law was a bitch and only gave him a four foot chain., and I teared up. I miss him lots and seeing his old dog house and that fucking chain made me think of all the years he spent just chained up and alone. At least he got three months of love before he was killed… ugh. I wish he didn’t come to be with us sometimes because it feels like it was our fault for him being there.
But I slept all day.  The weather was rainy so it was optimal weather to sleep and that was great. It was a dreamless sleep and it was dark and it felt amazing that I could wake up and not be tired for once. Even at work now I’m doing great. Not dozing here and there. 
I wanted to go out and see if I could get some pictures of the kits, but since it was gloomy I didn’t think they would be out and about…and since me and mama fox scared the hell out of each other yesterday, I don’t want to give her a reason to move the babies and end up moving them to the neighbors…where they would be killed.  So, I’m going to leave them be for a few days and on a nice day I’ll go out and see if the babies are out and about and snap some photos of them<3 Nathan’s even gonna let me feed them if the mom ends up getting shot by the neighbors.. They bought 4 new chickens and…you guessed it. They went missing overnight.  It’s either mama fox or the coyote that has been roaming over by their yard. 
Speaking of my neighbors… idiots.  They went and bought a dog to keep the coyote’s away… I say they are stupid…because they got a french bulldog puppy.  Don’t get me wrong! He is such a cute little thing and I love him, but….he is gonna get snatched up as fast as those chickens!  The coyotes will grab him and so will the eagle that is nesting in their trees! My gods! You’d think you would get a bigger breed to be able to chase off these things and not be something that would prey as well!
I got after them about not letting him roam across the road.  Not that I wouldn’t mind him coming over to our house so Kadaj has a playmate, but… I know damn well the farmers and people who work for them will run him over faster than they ran over Blue. I’m just worried for their animals because they don’t seem to get it. 
And I know foxes and coyotes are considered vermin around here, but I think they are beautiful creatures and deserve to live…I mean it is getting harder for them to do that since people keep taking over their native lands and they have no where to go. I mean.. North Dakota is literally nothing but farm land. So…yeah. No where for these animals to go.  Minnesota and Canada have been having wild fires that send their wildlife here and it’s the worst place for them to be because we don’t have their habitat.  The farmers keep burning down shelter belts where something MIGHT have a chance to live… So I’m glad the foxes were able to find a home in our yard. Plus, my father in law likes they are around so they can eat the bunnies…He’s pissed because over the winter bunnies ate his apple tree and killed it lol
I love seeing the bunnies in my yard when I come home from work or wake up and drink my coffee while looking out the window. It’s nice to see animals out there. 
Maybe I’ll take photos of my yard to share with you… If anyone even reads my entries lol It’s a good 2 acre yard so there’s stuff. It looks like hell because my father in law won’t let me or my husband get rid of the scrap vehicles in the back.. Makes the yard look like a junk yard. -_- And we need to tear down the dead trees but he won’t let us. Gods forbid we want to make the yard look nice. lol
But yeah, I slept good for once. Got up and made pork chops and potatoes and ate dinner before Nathan left for work and I showered and got ready and left for work. Nothing really that interesting happens in my life. 
My life revolves around my animals and that’s okay<3  I don’t mind my boring life. My sister recently told me, “No wonder no one wants to hang out with you. You’re boring!” She’s going to be 40. I’m going to be 28 on July 3rd.  She is still so desperate to be young and cool that she has to make me feel bad for being young and boring. I mean.. I like being alone and doing like nothing. I like the quiet. I mean, you get me with my friends Jade, Nelly and Lisa and I’m fun and loud.  I just have to be comfortable and I’m not like that with a lot of people and …people just don’t seem to get that.
I don’t know why I brought that up… I guess it bothered me. 
Anyway. I gotta get stuff done at mother in laws still… Finish picking stuff up and trying to sell things and get the funeral done with.  I’ll be going off of no sleep Saturday and I don’t want to be the crabby bitch at my husbands funeral. -_-
Night Journalers

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