okay, okay, okay.

This song is too beautiful. It sounds exactly like what a song named “Love” should sound like. DNZ x Sunday, Love.

Jhfly, Love Rework. Sad but pretty.

Moow, I gonna die.

Lost Son, it’s been raining.

卿Mittens, hot cocoa.

elijah who, this girl.

 

I’m glad that Rebel Demon is okay! I was just being paranoid and worrying too much.

 

Today my English teacher gave this terribly emotional speech to our class. It was about hard work, regrets, and dream-following. I started crying very surreptitiously. He also had us write our names and addresses on envelopes so he could write letters to us all over the summer. Anyway, he said that he started out a swimmer in college, but got frustrated at not being the best, so he quit swimming for a year+ and just let himself drink and go wild and out of shape. One day he popped by the nearest rec center’s pool and discovered that he couldn’t even swim 100 yards without wheezing, so he went home and looked in the mirror and just started crying his eyes out at what he’d let himself become, at how he’d given up on years of training and hard work. He told us that it is the worst feeling in the world, wondering what you could have become if you had only held on or tried harder. He said a lot more, like, we were going to be the ones who would have to look back on our choices at 40; the things that we can be proud of are the things that are hard and challenging; if our heart is pulling us in a certain direction, then we should follow it. I was crying because MAN, it was a FEELS trip from start to end. I always want to cry when our English teacher gets into his dad-coach-teacher-friend mode.

 

Testing starts tomorrow, and ends on Thursday. I only have three tests to take. Programming tomorrow, physics on Wednesday, and precal on Thursday morning. Then my year will be done… I’m really sad. I’m so SAD, goddamn it! It’s terrible. I miss this year already.

 

Tomorrow’s probably the last time I’ll see JS until school starts again. I’ll really miss her. Fact is I’ll really miss all of my friends… My teachers…

I won’t miss walking to school, though. It was storming this morning, and the rivers that had formed in the road were deep enough to develop civilizations. My shoes and pants were soaking.

 

I’m tired and sad and I miss everything. I’m so SAD right now oh m yGO D it’s terrible, my head really just hurts from feeling so sad all the time. Why can’t I just enjoy almost being on summer break like a normal person?!

 

Deep breath. It’s okay. It’s going to be fine. I’ll be okay, okay? Okay.

 

Just keep listening to this winter playlist, Winter With You by 卿Mittens. It’s warm and nostalgic and friendly. It should be snowing outside now.

Leave a Comment:

SCROLL TO TOP