What I do in my spare time

I’m bored and the tears won’t come so here is what I got out of the feeling I’m always drowning in that they call heart break. I don’t know why though. It’s just that my heart just… is gone. I have a bubble and that’s very fragile. Empty and easy to pop.

 

Fall & Fail

We’re just two broke kids
Loners at first sight
Wanted to cover the pain
You wanted one night
The sky seemed right
And my brain was gone
Would I still do it if I knew this all along?
If I knew it hurt so bad
And you made me so sad
Pretend to hate you
Avoid like I’m mad
But honestly it’s all for show
It’s crazy cause you’ll never know
You gave up and I drop my hope
A spark of light is always a falsetto
You’re a placebo to my sad life
Drizella only danced until the prince took his flight
The thing is I never gave you what they think I did
All a rumor he made
So the pain comes
And you’re not there
Left me here
Claiming I got no regrets
The nights are cold
And the days are long
I tried to let you go
Suffering as I sing my favorite songs
Although I want to chase I push you away
Cause I promised myself I’d never end up this way
I saw the ways my dad did my mom
And hated it
Just like her disrespectful son
He threw spit on my name
They get mad when girls say guys are all the same
I don’t think that’s true
But it’s hard to
When I’ve only been shown
The jerks I know
Some sweet boys in the mix
But they’re all shy
And I don’t like them
If I never knew what it felt like to not be alone
I’d never be bothered by the cold
I’ll get burned a couple of times
And forget how I even cried
I tried and tried
But I died inside
No big deal
Why’d I lie
It’s like whatever
Yeah I’m ok
Just another mask for another day
And he’ll never know I feel this way
Because I can barely speak when he comes my way
I hate his face
Wish he’d go away
But at the same time that’s also a lie
Beat a dead horse
The sun will still shine
We’re the pitfalls in our lives.

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