it would be selfish of me to ask you to stay when I know your heart is elsewhere in a place even you might not yet know. it would be selfish of me to ask if I could go with you, even though you and I know I would. when you really care for someone, their happiness is as much yours.
it might seem like I am pushing you away as I encourage you to go, but in reality… it is the most selfless thing I can do. my heart is breaking at the thought of goodbye.
so if you must go, know that it is okay. it is okay to be selfish. it is okay to hurt me as long as wherever you go I know you are happy.
my heart will feel heavy in your absence as I lay there awake at night wondering where you are and who you are with and id you finally find what I couldn’t give you, even when I tried.
I hope you find it, whatever “it” is you are looking for; but of all things I hope and I pray for is that you find true happiness… even if it is without me.
but if you should know anything…
why you are out there and I am here…
know I probably spent every day missing you.
so if there is ever a day you want to come back
I am still here
if there is a day you realize what I have known all along…
all you have to do is ask and I will be there, wherever “there” is
because when people ask about home… for me it has always been you
I hope whatever you find out there it leads you back to me. if that doesn’t happen and we each go our own way… I find comfort in knowing you found what you needed.
if my silence could speak in your absence in the time we are bound to be apart it would say, ‘there isn’t a day I haven’t loved you,’
I hope that’s enough.
enough to bring you back home and realize
everything you’ve wanted and needed has been here all along