I had a dream about my ex last night.  More like a dream about texting him.  I accidentally sent him a text about something I thought was funny and he replied back like nothing was wrong.  I miss that.  Just having someone to text about my day or to vent or if I think something is interesting.  I have a few friends I can do that with but not as close as I was with my ex.  Not that kind of connection.  I just miss talking to him.  I don’t miss the sex though as our relationship got kind of stale the last two years.  I’ve got enough sex going on right now as it is.  I hungout with Anthony on Saturday.  I thought for sure he’d flake again.  I basically scolded him for not texting me back and he apologized but whether it was sincere or not it doesn’t really matter.  We’re never going to be more than friends with benefits.  We went out for a couple drinks then went back to his place and had sex.  I didn’t get much sleep that night and work the next day was actually pretty busy and I was a little tired.  Then I heard from Conor yesterday whom I haven’t heard from in almost a month.  No “hey how have you been?” but a “what are you doing? Want to come over?”  That’s pretty much my extent of relationship I have with men these days.  I know none of these guys are relationship material and I know I’m not ready for a relationship (even though I wouldn’t turn down one if the right guy came along) but I need sex too so it’s ok for now to keep them around.  I have work again today and then finally a day off tomorrow.  I feel like this work cycle has been dragging on.  Hopefully today won’t go by too slow like it has been.  I’m not sure what I’m doing tonight but I’m ok with doing nothing.  I’ve been going out a lot so I’m actually pretty satisfied and tired for now. 

Leave a Comment: