I feel so awkward feeling the way that I do. It’s a good awkward though! I’m more motivated and that makes me happy! With more motivation I see me gaining more in life financially and career wise!
The educating myself gives me such an understanding of my disease! It’s not “curable” but it can be treated and maintained. I still sometimes want to go and grab some beer, but my will power to stay sober is stronger than my desire to have a beer!
Nearly every negative thing that’s happened to me over the last few years has been a direct result of drinking alcohol. Right down to 99% of every argument or issue that I’ve ever had with LLS. If not for alcohol, Her and I would most likely be doing something fun right now or planning something fun.
As odd as it sounds though – and as much as I kick myself in the ass, there are parts of me that feel glad that I went through that faze of drinking! Often, negative things can help you grow into a better person. I guess it’s all in how you look at it!
I didn’t really do much today and that bothers me a bit! I had to work – but I did get some time to spend with my Dad! It was nice! His encouragement, advice and spirit has been awesome!
I am thinking about taking up jogging again! I figure, as long as I’m not drinking, I can fill a void with something that is healthy and with something that will naturally make my mind feel good. Plus no hangover or side affects….unless I break an ankle or something. Haha
See – even my sense of humor is becoming more sharp! I like that! I like it a lot!