Yesterday someone asked me if I would push a red button even if there was a sign saying “do not touch it”, I immediately said yes and asked the person the same question, he pondered upon his words and just asked me one simple question, he asked me “What if I die?”.
I was static because at that moment I realized how people only care about the “what ifs”. We are trapped in the past that haunts us, we question ourselves days and nights, regretting the choices we made and thinking what we could have made different.
We do not realize how life is passing by us without even giving us time to think. We can not change the past. I can not change the past.
Worrying about how I was raped will not change the ultimate fact that I was raped, that I was used. But I think I deserve better than just live in the past. I think I deserve a present where I can actually live instead of just survive, where I will be part of life instead of being a spectator.
And I know with all my heart, you do too.