Nostalgia

Its 8:24 PM and here I am thinking back to the days before I became the person I am today. I was free to do what I wanted, free to go where I wanted to go and spend the money I earned selfishly. Looking back, I realized that person that had the freedom to do what she wanted with who she wanted and where she wanted was not truly happy. Happiness is staring into the eyes of one and seeing growth and laughter staring back at you. Happiness is looking into the eyes of your newborn baby and being unsure of whether you wanted to cry or to laugh but in your heart all you could feel was love. Happiness is watching your greatest blessing barely a year old, walking across the room for the first time and aiming directly for the space between your arms and knowing that one day when they cross the stage with a huge smile 18 years later, you will feel tingles down your spine and butterflies in your stomach. I was never free before… I never showed growth and I never knew real love until the day I looked upon the eyes of my baby boy and seeing heaven smile back at me. One year of growing up alongside him and soon I will feel another feeling of strength and love when his baby brother is born in the next coming days.

 

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