My mother is crazy. My father is crazy. My brothers are NUTS! I always thought I was the normal one. Here I am though, losing my ever loving mind. Going from thought to thought, torn into a million different directions…
How do you know you love someone? Truly and deeply? Or is there such a thing? At the beginning of this, I really thought there was. I loved someone so much that I let them physically hurt me for months…but that was okay because it wasn’t like I wasn’t beating myself up anyway. When I finally got away from there, I thought I’d found the perfect man. He was sweet and FUN! I was living happily…for a while. But then things started getting hard, life got hard. It always does right? But does it change the way people feel about you? Can the things you go through as a couple push you apart, even if you’re succeeding?
What happens when the person you fell so in love with begins to look at you with nothing in their eyes? We built an empire together…and I’m beginning to feel like burning it down.
Constantly angry….always angry with me. I cook, clean, take care of a child…yet you come home and the minute I open my mouth, you’re mad at me? Alone. That is how I feel. More alone than I’ve ever been before.
I just want to be perfect for you! I’m screaming and crying inside, but for some reason, I can’t portray that to you in a way that doesn’t anger you. I feel alone, and you say that’s my fault..Everything I do is wrong to you. You love me, but you want to change me? I’ve already given up everything I have. Now I’m stranded with you.
I feel alone and trapped.