fuck the title

Ok so this is what happend

I have an important test tomorrow, and I am almost bad. I am: mentally confused and feeling desesperated. It’s kinda different of anxiety, I feel like my brain is not working like it should. I also can feel it physically.

Recently I’ve been disapointed with one of my friends. I realized that everytime I have problem with people that I believe in, I get in this mental situation again. And I also know that it usually get worse if I don’t treat it properly (from other experiences). 

Now, I’ll have to wait 2 or 3 days to have time to see my psychologist. The episode with my friend happend on saturday. On that day I cried, and in the next one (sunday), by the end of the day I was doing ok. Today I wasn’t really caring or remembering the episode but I am bad and I think it has something to do with it.

If I hadn’t gone trough this before, I would be pretty bad right now. When this kind of thing happend 5 years ago, I used to end up in the hospital with  cardiac arrhythmia and an unstoppable crying. Hopefully, I already know how to deal with it better. Also hopefully I have some cigarrets and some bears in the fridge. 

yey. welcome to adulthood.


really really no mood for good English today

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