For whatever reason everything around me is crashing down. I see you everywhere i go. Memories of you everywhere. I cant talk about you to anyone because no one understands…..but that isnt fair. I have so much to say and no one to say it to. I wish i could just tell you, not this you, but the old you. I wish so badly that i had one day with you. The you i love, the you before the drugs, the women, the fame. I wish so badly i could have my rock back. I wish our daughter knew you before you became this monster. Ive lost myself in all of this. Its been four years since ive seen you face to face. How can we go four years without eachother after spending 6 years side by side, after being hand and hand. Now here i am, trying to make these two hands equal our four hands….for our little girl. I hate this feeling….