My older cousin recently moved in and he seems a bit weird. While he’s sick he will be staying with us. I’ve been living with him for a total of a month now, four weeks, and things are sometimes frustrating.
My cousin has this giant box of pills and vitamins he keeps around, and he constantly uses the sink for his goats milk, he seems obsessed with organic crap. Not that it’s a bad thing, I mean he might die in a year, so I try to be tolerant while he fights his terminal illness. He eats well, I suppose I can admire that.
I kind of enjoy having him around, and other times I don’t. I can’t use the living room for exercising anymore, since not even my family must find out that I’m chubby. I am too embarrassed to even do sit-ups in front of close relatives.I certainly won’t be doing them in front of him, or he might see how fat I am.
Anyways, he’s a very nice guy, I guess. I usually don’t trust men, and he seems like bad news all over. My parents haven’t seen him in nearly twenty years until he suddenly shows up needing a place to stay. He actually didn’t even say that, he just showed up one day and announced he was staying here and dumped everything into my bedroom, as a result I am sharing a bed with my mother, and a room.
My mother has an abusive past, so sometimes he lets her vent to him, he listens and it’s pretty awesome. I sometimes think he sucks up to her just so his stay here is prolonged if he somehow gets better. I’m kind of jealous she can be so open.
He always talks about his experiences with women and he looks like a teenage boy, even-though he’s nearly forty-one. He also has a son that he ‘accidentally’ had. He kind of seems like he gets and goes around 24/7. Not to mention his mind seems to be in the gutter 24/7. I think he just wishes he had a woman, to be honest.Because he’s single as hell and no one will date him because of his illness and the fact that he has a 4 year old son.
I sort of wish I could open up to him. Even if it’s a bit delusional, every-time I pray for something or someone, they always show up, and he happened to come after one of my prayers. I’m not very faithful to Christianity like I should be.I still pray and believe, though it’s not as strong as it used to be. All my prayers have been answered in one way or the other, even if it took 6 months to a year, I usually got what I asked for, and sometimes it doesn’t last.
I don’t think venting to him about my own abuse would be good anyways. I don’t like males, and plus, he’s only earned a bad reputation. I like him over my abuser anyways, but I’m still cold to him.I’m awaiting the day he stabs my family and everyone in the back or injures my family emotionally in one way or the other, since that’s what always happens. I don’t want to be part of that though. It would be nice if there was someone I could talk to in my immediate life, someone who could really give me the extra push or encouragement. It’s a bit silly how I want to jump at any chance I have at having someone like that.