Ok I am literally (not realy) into Paramore new album.
There is a song, called “caught in the middle” and I am perfectly described in the line: “I don’t need no help, I can sabotage me by myself”. I am so fucking good at doing this! This is the thing I know how to do the better.
So, I have toooooo many things to do and the only thing I am really able to do is sleep and drink and think “omg I am a real piece of shit”. And today I was just a piece of shit (no overeacting here). I didn’t go to my sister’s home (and she is preg) because I had to study, and I did barely nothing today. The best friend I had in childhood gave a party today bc she is also having a baby (and also it was her birthday) and I didn’t go too! Guess what??! I am a real piece of shit! =D
One of the things that make me feel like a piece of shit is writing it down and seing how small my problems are. I get really upset for being really upset for NOTHING. So many people have real problems.
I think I know why it happens: I expect too much of myself and of my future, so, this kind of thing that I’m writing here is really a big deal. It is what is keeping me away from my dreams. And gues what it is??? Me!!