I’m sorry

 Today was proof that I can’t be what God wants me to be. I’m not good, it’s just the way I am. Ask my kids? Today I got mad over a stupid thing, and instead of helping, I blew up and yelled. I know loads will say it’s ok, that we all have those days, but it’s not ok. It’s unjust anger, and I still can’t get over the pain. I love you Amy and I’m sorry…

One thought on “I’m sorry”

  1. Don’t be the person that God wants you to be or you’ll end up hating yourself. Be the best person you can be. Don’t look to a deity for a path. Look at the path before you instead. I may not be a religious person, but I’m pretty sure whatever created us, if anything, cares more about us finding our own path of growth instead of one that people say that they want.

    I also have bipolar disorder. You’re not alone. It took me a long while to finally draw the line between making others happy and making myself happy. Sometimes it isn’t a straight path. Twists, turns, bumps in the road etc. Just sit down with your child and maybe use this as an opportunity to teach them about how everyone has limits and sometimes things can push mommies and daddies a little too much. Just apologize and explain that sometimes when Mommy says “no” it means that Mommy is stressed and doesn’t want to end up hurting anyone’s feelings out of irritation.

    My mom blew up on me once and said a lot of stuff she didn’t mean. It hurt, but my dad explained to me that sometimes, it can be the last straw in your day and end up spilling over. My mom and I still have arguments, but we both know what the other person’s limits are now and try to avoid pushing them.

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