36. Anonymous

The moon was absolutely gorgeous tonight. It was huge, bright as can be, partially hidden by clouds, and with a dusk orange glow. I love the night sky.


I don’t miss the emotional rollercoaster of T. Once second its one extreme, another second is the other side of it. It’s a very rough adjustment, its hard to not just convert it into frustration. Which is what I did during round one. Last night was suppose to be shot two, how ever I left for work and forgot my things. Today I wasn’t sure what James’ schedules was, I was entirely to busy to figure it out anyhow. With only a week to sort through and pack the entire house my self, trying to maintain school, plus work, there just isn’t much time. This morning was filled with packing, aside the panic of how I was going to pay for my reinstatement by tomorrow. When I got home last night I pretty much went straight up stairs to bed. Not realizing what I had missed. After 3 hours of sleep, I stumbled down stairs to take Dakota for her morning walk. I looked down to see Ann’s phone, and tablet sitting there with a letter. A very similar letter to the one she wrote once before…

I sat and one ground and read the letter over and over again, for an hour. I finally messaged her and we talked a little. Agreed we were going to sit down and talk., either this evening, or some time tomorrow. For the rest of the afternoon, I was pretty much busy gathering boxes and packing until I got ready for work.

My evening took a turn I honestly have no words for. I’m speechless. Tonight’s shift was nothing more then my awkward Monday night shift, just a tad more irritating. The laziness and pointless complaining from the other guys is really becoming annoying. Once I clocked out is when things…shifted. Ann gave me her phone number, had me call her when she got out of class. We talked…the entire way home, as I drove behind her. We pretty much take the same route home. The things is, while we were talking she invited me over for dinner.                                           

 I went. Obviously. 

Something happened. I’m not sure what, but the world lit up.

We sat and ate dinner as we usually would. We started play fighting, then she started tickling me, then she had me pinned to the ground, straddling me. Suddenly she bit my neck, in a bet she could stop me in my tracks. She did. I turned 50 shades of pink. My heart pounded so hard I could feel it in every vein. We kept play fighting, then she stood up, took her shirt off, glanced over shoulder at me, then off came her bra, and I came undone. She walked away to her bed room, I sat unable to move for what felt like forever. I couldn’t help but suddenly jump up, race to her bed room to see her standing there, begging for my hands to roam. I went for it, I had to. I pushed her against the wall, kissed her, a blaze I went. It has been a week since I had kissed her, touched…felt her. It’s the best high in the entire world.

I didn’t stay, I left shortly after, she was obviously tired. On my ride home I got a text message from James asking where I was. I completely forgot to let him know I wasn’t stopping over for my shot. His next text message was, he was “out and about and stumbled on something I may need.” I replied with “What’s that?”. This message blew me off my feet. He said “$800”. the amount I need for my reinstatement. I questioned him a little, then just decided to head to his place. Almost instantly upon walking into his apartment he hands me this wad of cash. I just stood there, I honestly didn’t think he was serious, he just wanted me to show up and talk to me about something. He made it clear it wasn’t from him, the someone contacted him at some point today, met up with him and said it was for me, and what it was for. Also, this person instructed him not to tell me who they were. No one I know has that kind of money just stashed away, that they can just give away with out asking for it back., anonymously. I’m beyond thankful, its…a blessing. Who am I thankful to? Why wouldn’t they want me to know. I cant even  describe how I feel, other then speechless.


3 am is creeping closer. I have to be up at six to get to the BMV before court. Sleep is pointless these days. anonymous    

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