i don’t know why I’m feeling somewhat lost, angry, sad, and confused all at the same time. but it seems to me that I know exactly why I feel this way but don’t want to say it out loud. you see, for a long time I have “searched” for a boyfriend (per say). I have always been the type of person that longed for what other people had. if it looked special, I wanted it. I wanted it to look exactly as I had seen it and for people to see how special it was. but I have been working on myself, for what seems like forever, and now I don’t want a boyfriend. I need a person. a person to tell every little thing that happened in the very second that happened to me. the first thought in my head would be “omgsh I have to tell …..” I’m sure I have found a person because I literally tell her everything now but for some reason, that’s not enough. I need a person to call my own without having an hestation and second thoughts. without feeling like I’m bothering anyone. theres also the fact that the person that I have right now gets me. so maybe after all I do have a person, maybe not to call my own but I have a person and I think that’s going to have to be enough for now. but I’m hoping one day (maybe sometime in the near future) that I find my person who can make me happy.