Just Tonight

Harry: “Baba.”

Me: “No, you’re not having pasta, you’re having beans. Can you say beans?”

Harry: “No.”

Needless to say he didn’t eat his beans. He pushed the plate away and said “Da,” which is how he says stars. This refers to those little stars made of chocolate called Magic Stars. It’s the sort of smallest chocolate bites you can get and thought it was perfect for Harry so he wouldn’t end up eating too much chocolate. But now it’s come to the point where he refuses food and asks for “da” instead. Needless to say he had no desert either this evening. Instead I broke him up his famous Belvita breakfast biscuit…it sounds weird as hell but he loves them. The nursery nurse who comes to see Harry every week or so about his fussy eating problems said these breakfast biscuits are probably why he seems to have energy all the time even though he eats not too much else. Ok he loves pasta and bananas but there we go, that’s what he lives on most of the time. These biscuits are meant to give an ADULT energy for the whole morning so to him it’s energy for the entire day so I guess the nursery nurse has a point. I know these breakfast biscuits have a bit of sugar but they are cereal and I’d rather Harry didn’t go to bed with an empty stomach. He would have been fine I know, a human being wouldn’t let itself starve but it makes me feel better. He’s too young to be so harsh about food with to be honest.

Anyway Harry is beautiful, sweet and ever so funny but…he has been HORRENDOUS today. Yet at the pray & play group from 10:15am- 12pm this morning he was practically perfectly well behaved. Even the group organiser said that Aneurin was badly behaved and that Harry was a lot more laid back and calm. Then back at home he is an absolute nightmare, I actually haven’t known anything like it so far. I know he is teething and he is still really insecure after spending his six hours with his father last Sunday but now Harry is screaming about anything I do for myself. Today if I sat down he would throw a tantrum and try push me off the seat. He tantrums if I go to the toilet, if I have a drink, if I’m eating, if I take one glance at my phone…ARGH. Yesterday he charged into me so hard his head smashed into my lip. He also came racing towards me on his ride on tractor & hit me full throttle in the legs. An odd one he was doing today was crying and tantrum-ing if I left the room but he would shut the door, then obviously cry and tantrum about the door being shut…he did this about three times before I gave up and picked him up. Every morning I wake up with a horrible bad back and often can’t get up until I have two paracetamol & two ibuprofen tablets.

I love Harry but gosh I’m finding him too much at the moment. I’m SO TIRED!

Today has also been the first time that mum has seriously spoken to me about her concern with dad and how immobile he I becoming. He sleeps 90% of the time now. He is obese; he has the worst diet of all time, barely moves & takes loads of different medications and has done for decades, some of them have the side effect of putting on weight. Mum even said if he carries on like this…we’d have to put him in a care home as we can’t keep coping with him like this 🙁 I’m tired I have to go.

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