I feel as if I need to go back into therapy. There’s just no time and I don’t want my parents to pay the money.
I miss my therapist. It’s officially been over a year that I just stopped going. I sense myself getting bad again. I think I have seasonal depression. It’s always around the time of school starting. I just need to learn to deal with it and turn it into someone positive.
Therapy didn’t help me back when I was going, but now that I think about it, I would just like to talk it out to someone who could maybe help me. I talk things out with my friends, and they just relate. One of my friends really relates. We are basically the same human being. My other friends “relate”, but we just agree that we wanna kill ourselves and then go and rant about God knows what. I kind of miss my therapist. I feel like I just need someone else to talk to.
Sometimes, I feel like I’m going insane. I am so fucking brokenhearted, I cannot handle it anymore. I want to have more friends, but I have too much anxiety to go hang out with those people. It sucks. I am so tired of feeling like I am on my own in this fucked up world. It’s a constant cycle that I constantly feel, and I am tired of it.
I have to go. I am at my friend’s house and she just walked back into the room. I really wish my mom could just come get me, I am tired of being around her. I love her, but I’ve been around her for 4 days.
Song of the entry: Save Me – Xxxtentacion