I’m angry. Like randomly angry. Cruel. I get horrible thoughts of hurting my dog. I’ve come close to it sometimes. He doesn’t deserve that. He’s just there being vulnerable. Sometimes I feel like kicking him until I hear his ribs crack. Other times I want to make him angry so he bites me. I’m not ok. I’m not even mad at him. It’s all these pent up emotions just want to burst out in a horrible way. I’ve taken up skateboarding as a distraction from it. It’s helped with my friend being around too. He’s a great distraction from the thoughts in my head.
I'm growing. With every entry. With everything I read. Obviously. Like everyone else. I"m selfish. I hate the word but I am. I try not to be. I've found this website to be a great emotional outlet for the few times that I've written on here. Enjoy the jumbled mess.