if a dog loves you but leaves you in bruises

does that dog love you?

yes, yes it does. it’s just a damn big happy dog.

i don’t know how to get my mental shit together. i’ve said repeatedly in the past that i have to but i can now admit that i have no idea how to do that. my coping skills are terrible. i cope by eating too much bready carbs and tearing the skin off my fingers and doing retail therapy.

i don’t want to diet because i don’t want to get rid of my coping foods. because if i don’t have those then i have nothing to cope with. i can’t make myself focus on cross stitching or reading or walking. i’m not much of an alcoholic so being drunk 24/7 is out. i don’t have an addictive personality as far as drugs go so that’s out. i rarely write. my brain gets on my nerves. i just want it to cooperate.

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