Farewell

Finally October is here.  My favorite month of the year.  Too bad it’s also the start of me flushing people out of my life like they’re toilet paper.  That means I’ll have no one to do all the fun October stuff with.  Not like I really did before anyways.  Saturday night I went out with my one good girl friend and I was supposed to hangout with Anthony too but Gina took so long to get ready that by the time we went out he was too tired.  So it was just us two and we just sat at this one bar and drank a couple beers.  We really didn’t have a whole lot of time out because she took forever but I guess that was a good thing since I had to work the next day anyways.  We didn’t really talk to any guys or anything, just kind of had a girls night out.  Somehow things transpired through the night that made me rethink the people I’ve been talking to and how they really don’t give me the respect I deserve.  I mean it’s not like I’ve been wanting to date any of those guys anyways but still, I don’t think I should be giving it up that easily if I’m really not getting anything out of it.  I mean, when’s the last time a guy wanted to take me out to dinner or paid for my drinks even?  I mean there has been a few times here and there but lately it seems like I’m really getting the shit end of the deal.  So I went on a deleting my contacts binge that night and also deleted my Snapchat so I’m officially back off the grid.  I’m just done with going out for awhile or going out with guys unless they do something for me first.  I’m tired of people treating me like shit and yeah maybe it’s the way I’ve been presenting myself but I’m not going to let myself do that anymore.  I deserve better.  So this journal is about to get real boring because I won’t be going out as much and having any adventures but oh well.  It’s for my mental health.  Anthony invited me out tonight but he’s one of the guys contributing to me feeling like crap so unless he offers dinner, I’m not interested anymore.  Thankfully I have two days off and today I spent it on a cleaning spree.  I guess I wanted to clean my entire life including my room.  I’m exhausted and I still have to workout at some point.  Tomorrow I’m going to try and sell some clothes to make some extra money and just have a relaxing day otherwise.  I guess it’s going to just be me, myself, and I for awhile now. 

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