“Im sorry. But this isn’t just a tiny gust of anxiety rushing through me now. This is me every day,every single moment I’m facing other people.”, she explained, trying to talk quickly so her voice doesn’t get cut by the near closing of her throat.” Its not that Im trying to create drama or…or seek attention. No! Attention is the last thing I want to be drawn to me. I want to be unnoticed. I want to be unknown.” The pooling tears are now in the race down from her eyes. Shivering now,she started stroking her arms for comfort.
He wanted so much to embrace her. Hug her tight so she won’t ever feel alone as her claims are. But he wouldn’t want to cross the line after what she just said about how people make her feel. The times she pulled away from every demonstration of concern he had toward her, all the times he felt like she’s trying to avoid him, and all those times that what she say doesn’t seem to add up; it wasn’t her trying to act dumb or aloof, she was shy.
He sighed heavily. The little springs of anger that he felt like he was ignored for unknown reasons, he regret them now. His pride is now bruised by his own narrow-mindedness.
“Please,” she bowed low.
He swallowed hard.
“Just leave me alone.No good will ever come by being around me.”