I am at school. I am a nervous wreck. I am so broke. I don’t know how I am going to make it through the next couple of months. I have got to start digging myself out of this mess. I need to sell a bunch of stuff when I get moved. If I sell my Chanel bag, that would help a lot. I will sell some shoes and other clothes. It doesn’t matter what I wear down there. No one cares or notices. I can wear my Danskos again. Hopefully my tax return will be at least a few thousand dollars to help me get my feet under me. I am so fucking broke. This year has been a financial disaster. I am feeling really overwhelmed right now. If I can just make it until Saturday, that’s when I can gather up a lot of my stuff and get it out of the school.
Just Keep Swimming
I am a 47 year old adult child of an alcoholic. My childhood could have been a Lifetime movie. I am dealing with PTSD, anxiety, and severe depression as a result. I am working on gaining an understanding as to what this means and learning how to be okay with myself. Some days, just killing myself and being done with it seems like the most sensible option. On those days, I keep telling myself, "just keep breathing in and out, that's enough for today."