I am back… I haven’t written an entry on here since May 11, 2016… it is currently 8:01 PM on October 17, 2017. Wow. Over a year. My world has changed entirely. Where do we begin…
When I left off from my last post in May 2016. I, wasn’t a strong wrestler… just a kid aspiring to be one. I did indeed have a boyfriend, David. I had very close friends in the likes of Sonny Kiss, and many others. My world turned upside down. Just a few weeks after I wrote that last entry, David had broken up with me. It wasn’t because he didn’t care, it was because he did care. It was arguably the nicest way you can break up with someone. It was on the phone but everything he said was genuine and he kept me from crying and he actually had me laughing. He explained how I gave so much up for him. Which he was right… I was half-assing wrestling and I just barely saw my friends because I was always focused on him. Now, at the point I am mentally I see the lessons I learned from that relationship and I understand everything happens for a reason. Before I get into detail remember, I was 18 years old. Now, I am 20. I have had A LOT of time to sit back on this and think about myself. When I was with David, I wanted his FULL UNDIVIDED attention. I truly did expect him to want to talk to me and see me 24/7. It was hard for me to comprehend why he would be on Facebook Messenger active, but not talking to me?!?! I couldn’t understand why he would just not message me some days. God forbid, we would separate while cuddling, I would go into a panic in my mind thinking he wasn’t into me anymore… Now I will give credit where it is due… if there is one thing Sonny did good for me, he gave me amazing advice for this relationship and these “issues” that in reality I was making up in my own head. Sonny had taught me that I needed to take that time to make him miss me… which he was 110% correct. I truly believe that made our relationship last a couple weeks longer, on the solid note that it was towards the end. When I compare myself then vs. myself now, I see loads of differences. I was someone who needed constant attention and affection and acceptance of a significant other. I didn’t really do anything. at all. I wrestled once or twice a month… I was a senior in high school. Just an insecure kid. Where as now, I am a young adult. I wrestle every single week. I have my friends that I talk to on a daily basis but for the most part, I’ve learned to love my personal space. I don’t have to wake up and shoot a message to the person I’m talking to right away to make sure that said person still wants me. In fact, I’m still not sure that I’m even ready for a relationship because I have so much going on in wrestling. Aaannyyywaaaayyyyy, let’s get back to May 2016. It was indeed a very easy break up when it had happened, but I fell off the wagon. I went to school piss drunk every day for two weeks. I didn’t go to school the last week and I even skipped graduation. I was destroyed. It was a feeling that I couldn’t begin to describe… constant emptiness. Numbness. Nothingness. Blank. No emotion. I began hooking up with so many different people over the course of the summer just looking to get atleast one feeling in my chest again.
As summer went on I began to travel around with a long-time friend… Austin Highley. Who wrestles under the alias “Ace Austin”. He’s the Gambit of pro wrestling. In July, Ace had gotten me into CZW’s student show… Dojo Wars. I debuted in a whacky 6-man tag team match and man… did I learn a lot about myself. I was the S H I T S. Eventually, after a few Dojo Wars events, the owner of CZW, DJ Hyde had come up with an idea to pair me up with the other two openly gay wrestlers who work on the CZW women’s show up on the main roster (WSU or Women’s Superstars Uncensored) “The Boy Diva” Rick Cataldo and “The Fabulous One” Eddy McQueen, “The Fella Twins”. We were going to become “The Fella Twins Academy”. Rick and Eddy were the head honchos of the Academy and my new friends Maria Manic, Penelope Ford, and myself were the pledges. We were a sorority. A mean girls sorority. On September 10, 2016 I debuted on the WSU roster managing Rick and Eddy against Bale-Spin (KC Spinneli and Xandra Bale). The match went phenomenal and it was altogether a great night. After the show, which took place in Voorhees, NJ I had to take Rick back home to Brooklynn and Eddy from Northern NJ, then I was to head back to the Sanctuary in Hazleton. Well… no. That’s just not at all how that went. Right after I dropped Rick off I crossed the Verrazano Bridge. About 10 minutes off the bridge, I fell asleep while driving…and flipped my car four times. Don’t ask me how Eddy and I are still alive to this day… Convertible top down… heads no more than 6 inches above the highway. Major set back… not physically but mentally. Nor Eddy or I were injured in the accident, luckily. That was the beginning of the end of a friendship I was starting to develop with Eddy. Which there are somethings I’m not comfortable sharing with the world and that would be my problems with Eddy and my falling out with Sonny.
So the months between October 2016-February 2017 just seemed to be such a blur. I remember everything as it happened but it doesn’t feel as though it really did. I made some amazing friends like, Maria Manic, Penelope Ford, Su Yung, Becky Bayless, and so many more. I will touch base on all of them in my next entry.
Lets skip to the summer of 2017… What a melt down I had. I thought my world was abruptly coming to an end. The week of June 15, 2017 I was driving home from Florida with Becky Bayless and my friend from high school, Gia. I drank a Rockstar and my whole left arm went numb. I was having heart palpitations… A whole entire summer of pure anxiety of the fear of having a heart attack or a stroke. That was on my mind 24/7. It ate me alive, I am still working on coping with it.
On June 23rd, 2017 I ran my third ever show at the Sanctuary… that night I had wrestled Su Yung, in easily one of my favorite matches I’ve ever had. That night, which like I said I will not get into detail but my falling out with Sonny happened. I fell into the deepest depression. I wanted nothing more than to die. The Bryce we have all known to be a sweet innocent boy left. The dark side of me was triggered. I fell off the face of the planet. I left wrestling entirely. Lived at the Sanctuary and I didn’t show my face at all. I just stayed in watching Rob Zombie movies and 90’s horror movies. I had no self-esteem or self confidence.
Over the course of the summer I took ONE pro wrestling booking. It was against, the greatest man on the entire planet. My FAVORITE fucking person. “The Chubby Daddy” Trajan Horn. August 4, 2017 I wrestled him at CCW (Classic Championship Wrestling) at a carnival. I remember this exact moment. Trae was holding me in the air for a stalling vertical suplex… the sun was going down, camping chairs were filled with kids and parents at the carnival, the rides and their flashing lights filled the air. I fell in-love with professional wrestling once again. The next night I tagged with Trae against Jaxon Stone and Alexander James at the Sanctuary. I knew exactly what I had to do. It was a sign. To take over the planet. Alongside of my best pal, Trae. Since those two days I spent with Trajan I have expanded myself as much as I can in wrestling. In September I made a different debut just about every single weekend. In new shows and states. Trae has been pushing me to hit harder and work more and I have been pushing him to expand and market himself to a bigger audience. I am so thankful for Trae because I truly believe it wasn’t for the kick in the ass he gave me, none of what I am doing right now would be possible.
In the very end of August and the month of September I debuted for:
Rockstar Pro- Dayton, OH
Rampage Pro- Dover, DE
SWA- Toccoa, GA
Bandit Wrestling- Knoxville, TN
GSW- Old Forge, PA.
I wouldn’t be able to do so if it wasn’t for my amazing support system. Thank you, I love you all.