I’m hanging onto hope that this door closing is a positive thing and is what is meant to happen. Kind of like that dog and chocolate metaphor, your dog might sad when you don’t allow them to eat chocolate but you’re just looking out for what’s best for them physically and mentally even if you can’t explain that to them. I am going to try to work on being content as friends because the friendship with the four of us is amazing and I’m so thankful for that. Just because the one friend isn’t going to become more doesn’t mean that I can’t still enjoy the friendship. Beautiful mind was about him, and that can still be true without romance involved. I think if God is closing the door by bringing in someone else for him that it means I was never meant to go that route and that his plans for me will be better. The purpose of me meeting the three of them was probably to give me strong friendships and happiness within that. I wasn’t meant to date Noah, and while I’ve wanted to I’m going to try to work on accepting that it’s not in our cards and just enjoying our friendship. He likes Faith, and thinks it’s going to work out with her. And while part of me is hurt by that, I also know that this is God’s plan and I need not fret because no matter if he’s dating someone or not he was still put into my life. Just like Kyle and Spencer and their girlfriends, we are still just as great of friends. So there’s nothing to worry about with Noah and Faith, their relationship will grow and it won’t negatively affect Kyle, Spencer and I’s relationships with Noah and that’s very reassuring. I guess the main underlying thing here is that I just want somebody to love, you know? And I want them to reciprocate. Life is hard and people are difficult but like there is so much greatness in them too and I want to experience that.
God has a plan for me. This is how it is supposed to go. Everything will be alright.
p.s names were changed for this