As the morning progresses I am not gathering or building up any energy or enthusiasm for the day ahead.  It’s almost a feeling of hopelessness.  I have so many things to do both real, important and necessary and this that are not and I just can’t wrap my head around it all and where to start.  I really don’t like this feeling, even worse I don’t like having to pretend or fake til I make it.  I want to face it head on and address it with a plan but I don’t feel like I’ll be able to do that.

Added to that I really don’t feel like I’m a good leader or boss.  My team is almost one their own fending for themselves, not that anything is wrong with if they were succeeding and making constructive useful decisions and or pushing themselves.  

To be fair I did have a boost this morning when I was working it out.  This feeling really blossomed waiting for the train on my way to work and a sense of resistance doing so and being in that environment came over me.  My stop’s here gtg.

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