Kitty, so good to talk to you again. I think I have been feeling too delusional lately about the person I cherish the most. I am acting rather hopeless. I want to be independent but I can’t help like him. I don’t want to admit to myself that I like him, yet I feel so hopeless….. Poor me….I shouldn’t be worrying abut things like this. This is unacceptable to myself. What should I do?????Should I try to forget about him. That day that I told him that I did like him out of the blue, he just texted me that he was rather surprised. What do you expect???How is it rather surprising. Maybe he wasn’t meant for me. I love him. That is a strong word. Yes, I do love him. I have never felt this way about anyone else. I also should have told him directly, face to face, but you see, this is my dilemma. I cannot meet him. It has been a long time since I have met him. I want to…..I really want to tell him directly that I like him. I miss him. I want to see him. It becomes too awkward though when I talk to him and then I start to say random things. Stupid things…..I am the one that is stupid. I don’t want to feel this. It is complicated for me….I should be worrying about other things. This is what I get…. Does everything always have to come with a consequence?????What to say to him if i see.
“Dear ******, I have missed you all these months that I have not seen you. How have you been? I really wish to spend more time with you. I miss you very much. I wish to see you everyday. Sometimes I want you to be with me here whenever I need you in a difficult situation. I want you to console me. I want you to embrace me and say everything is going to be alright. Whenever I cry, I always think of you. You and I are distances apart. Is there a way we can always be together. Maybe this is just my fiction. What type of things do you like. I wish we can eat ice cream together while viewing the ocean. I got sad when we departed good byes. Can we go do what normal couples do. I want to hold your hand and walk beside you.”