Friday, November 3, 2017
This day was pretty eventful.
I started off with technology. We had a substitute teacher. I half worked on my TIE Fighter, half did some scholarship stuff.
In English we read Othello and at some point I interrupted since it was passed the time that I was supposed to go to a college presentation. Right after I said it, an announcement came on asking for the students that signed up to go for it, so good timing on my part. Anyhow, I went and it was pretty informative. I learned that the program I’m going into there is the most or one of the most competitive programs there (great…), and that there would be a portfolio day in January (great, without the sarcasm, however it’s a couple of weeks before the application deadline, so that’s tight).
Afterwards I had to eat quickly so I could go to math. We had the group test and it was so stressful. Everyone was overthinking everything and in reality, if I did it alone, I would probably not have struggled as much. It would have still been hard, but since everyone was overthinking it, and because they made valid points, it was even harder to do it. But it’s fine, since if we didn’t do great, it wouldn’t effect our grade, since our teacher takes the two best ones of the chapter.
Anyhow, I had French afterwards and we continued our work. At some point I joined Kohai out in the hallway, since our substitute teacher allowed it; our class was being pretty loud.
Kohai, our close friend and I met up after school to go to do an escape room down town. IT WAS AMAZING. Despite some satanic symbolism I was uncomfortable around, we had to try and unlock locks to get out of an asylum room. We even had our own documents with our names on it, and they had to be used as clues! We also never argued and had great communication. Apparently for that room, there is a 20% success rate. We didn’t get out, but we were half of the average group and knew if we just had a full hour instead of 45 mins, we would’ve done it. Oh well! We were told for a group our size, we went pretty far. We only had three or four locks left, and we were about to unlock one.
We went out to talk about it so other people there wouldn’t get spoiled, but where we were was in front of a bar. A guy even stopped to ask if we had a lighter. I realised this and said we should go, which our close friend agreed, because she also said we should leave before I did and it was for that reason. We went out an accompanied Kohai to her stop so her mom could pick her up. We talked to her mom a bit, but my dad needed us to go back, cause he was in a place he couldn’t park. We left (a bit rudely maybe, cause we had to rush, but I hope I wasn’t) and talked about it all the way back to her place. We had lots of fun.
Saturday, November 4, 2017
I went to a class this day to get help for my portfolio, and guess what? My teacher is a second year student in the program I want, at the college I want! She knows exactly what they’re looking for, which is perfect! If this doesn’t get me into the program, then I don’t know what will.
For the rest of the day I didn’t do much. I just felt depressed. I’m getting a bit concerned, since I’ve been like this for long time now. I had lots of fun the day before with the escape room, probably the most I ever had, but when I got home and went to bed, I felt down again. I’m gonna wait it out until after applications. It might just be the stress and pressure of it all.
Anyhow, I got a big project in mind that I think would be fun.
Sunday, November 5, 2017
I decided not to go to church that day. I did a Bible study though.
I spent most of my time doing nothing but brainstorming. I worked a tiny bit on my essay though.
What I did go to was a memorial service at my church. My grandfather would be remembered so I wanted to be there. I was okay throughout the start, sad for other people’s losses of course, although mostly fine. But as soon as his picture came on screen, it just all came rushing back. I tried singing Amazing Grace, since that was the song that was decided for him, but I just couldn’t. I wish I was able too, for him, but my voice was too weak. I was like this for basically the rest of the songs and just refrained from singing from then on out. I kept almost breaking down a few times and most of my time was spent trying to keep it together.
Ourpastor came up to preach a little. He said at some point that he heard someone say : “When you lose a loved one, you feel like you’re drowning. You find an island, and you sit there for a while, but eventually you fall back into the water. With time you find more dry land, but in the end, you always fall back in. You never truly get over a loss.” I related to that so much and I’m sure other people did as well. We eventually move on with our lives, but there’s always gonna be some moments where we remember and everything comes rushing back.
My grandmother passed me a flower, since we were allowed to take one in rememberance of our lost loved ones. We talked to a few people, one of them being the guy that I would help with the camera to record the sermons for our church’s YouTube channel. I had a guy I knew that put his hand on my shoulder briefly while on his way out, which was nice. Also, the pastor and I seem to always be awkward around each other for some reason, probably because we basically never talk to each other, but he told me goodbye while leaving, which was also nice.
At home we watched an episode of Supernatural. Don’t want to go to school tomorrow. I just want to rest and be left alone, but I don’t have much of a choice.
That’s all for today.