On letting go

It seems like theres only one forward movement here for me, and that is to release you.

I woke up today after another night spent trying to forget you, what you did, what you meant to me. Considering that a little over a month ago I promised to give myself to you for forever, I think I’m doing ok with the transition. Blurred nights, late mornings. Crying out of no where. Hating you so much for doing this to me. I didn’t deserve this. 

You promised me change. You said you would prove it to me. I was counting on that being true so that everything would hurt less. I actually thought that you were going to prove that you were sorry, that you’d do anything to have me back. But instead it’s been the opposite. Selfish decisions, more lies. More pain.

I have to let you go. I have to leave here. I’m going to. 

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