Online Dating

After a long two year abusive relationship based on emotional and verbal abuse, I gave myself about two years to find myself again. In the present day, I feel that I have found myself and have learned to love myself once more. I am now a strong, and independent person; furthermore, I am so proud of myself for being able to fight for myself and what I believe in everyday. However, what I noticed when I entered my latest four year university was that most men prefer women to be easy. On the other hand, I am now putting myself on a higher standing than I have in years; therefore, I find it difficult for me to actually find a guy I would like to date. It is also hard to find a guy who is attracted to me. I know I am a pretty Asian girl with good social skills and high morals. (P.S. This is not because I think I am, but because I keep being told that by everyone I know.) Some of my friends think maybe it is because I made myself so self-confident and independent that it deters some men from looking my way. Either way, I am proud of myself for becoming the person I am today. 

Some of my friends persuaded me to try out online dating for once because it seemed I was not attracted to any of the guys around me nor was I really attracting much attention either. I started out with Ok Cupid, which led to Coffee Meets Bagel, and various other sites. I ended up deleting them all one by one because it seemed the males on there were not looking for a true match, but for an easy get together. I am craving for commitment and a passionate guy who would know how to make me laugh, while also upholding some strict moral values. It really turns me off when a guy ends up being a jerk or for being an unintelligent human being who thinks a corny pick up line would be enough to get him through the door and into my bed. As of now, I only have an East Meet East account and as of now, I am also soon planning to delete it too. I just feel that I cannot seem to find any potential guy who would understand me and respect me for the person that I am. Furthermore, all this searching has been giving me some social stress that I did not sign up for. I did get some matches with a few cute guys, but in my opinion, looks can only be considered as a bonus. When they each tried to message me, they would end up saying something I felt was not very fulfilling. As of now, I may or may not delete my account and just hope for love to come find me instead. 

2 thoughts on “Online Dating”

  1. That’s great that you took the time to find your self-most people just jump right back in and wonder why they find themselves in the same place 6 months later. I recently read this book and a small part of it discussed how he found his perfect wife.I have found mine before reading this book but it was still interesting admittedly abstract but interesting never the less. I have been addicted to personal development lately and bettering my self Its called The Compound Effect by dan hardy here is a link
    Or on second thought just look for it on amazon lol good luck

  2. I know there are many different types of people out there, but I felt I really needed the time to find myself again. Thank you for the book recommendation! I will check that out. Congratulations on finding your own perfect soulmate! I think it will be harder for me to find someone because I have really old fashioned ideals to top off the fact that some men I meet don’t like to reach for a hard to get woman like me, and also another fact that I cannot seem to find the courage to make the first move with them either since I’m scared of being considered “easy” as well.

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