today was hard.
i just wish my stupid fucking heart would stop beating. please take me out of my misery. please god, let it end here. im so weak. and its so hard and im so pathetic. i dont even deserve the gift of life.
i just feel so lost.
i dont even recognize myself anymore.
what happened to me? how did i get here?
will i ever find myself?
i hate how weak i am. because i dont want to be alive without him. he ruined me. i dont even want my life. i hate how he broke me.
giving up is hard but i suppose i couldn’t get very far either on own.
the only reason i dont commit suicide is because i cant stand the thought of breaking my parents hearts.