It’s difficult to create new habits. Especially without any willpower. The things I know are good for me, are the things I find it impossible to do. I have so many tools, but I have refused to use any of them. Here I am, back where I started, wondering how I got here, but really I know. I got cocky. I thought I was in control. Nope. Back to square one, I want to make conscious decisions again. I want to give my life and will over to Your care. I want to be in a different place than I have been. I want to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. I want to face my demons instead of running, to finally stop running.