Things are soooo Complicated

I swear I complicate my own life I do not need help in that department at all. I guess that’s why people say you can do bad all by yourself. I’m sitting here waiting on my menstrual to start. why you may ask.. because I did a bad thing I slept with some one besides my husband. I am totally wrong for it, however, me and my husband have not slept in the same bed in 8 months and we have not slept with each other in 17 months. So I was feeling my self one night and met up with an old friend and bam things happen. It was planned and we used protection I’m just paranoid I guess because I really don’t need another baby I have a lot of things going on and getting pregnant again would defiantly throw a monkey wrench In my plans. It was last month and after I had a funky (weird) period so I’m seeing if it will come on this month, but I can not really base it off of that because my period is irregular, so it tends to skip sometimes. due to me being overweight or to much stress and I am stressed not just because aunt floe hasn’t came to town(hope it comes on soon) but how my husband lies without thinking about it. It just comes so easy for him. The last time I spoke to him before our big fight, he told me he wasn’t speaking to his mother that they haven’t spoken in a while and that he is trying to get his life straight but my baby’s god father which is his best  friend told me other wise. that he wants to try to get a roommate, which he is to damn old to be trying to get roommate. He also told me that  he has been using his mothers car because his car is broken like wtf he just told me that he was not speaking to her.  So I have to speak to him and see if he lets the cat out the bag because he has not said anything. His mom called me and wants me to make plans about seeing my son but I’m thinking that I shouldn’t let her because she lies to and in the worst way. (lies rub off on children) She tells people I’m this awful person and she also always comments on my weight every time she did see me she would ask me if I was trying to lose weight and tell me I should because its not good to be as heavy as I am but she is not the skinniest person, she has weight on her but has the audacity to talk about my weight, which makes me so mad. I’m tired and I should be going to bed now the little one is playing in his play pin and my parents are asleep. Plus I really need to shower because my baby  vomited  on me  . off I go I need a drink.

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