Day 657 to 660 – Honour roll, baptism and age gaps

Sunday, December 17, 2017

Didn’t mean to not write for four days once again. I think it’s because I’m writing less and less to the point I’m forgetting or just saying “eh, I can do it tomorrow”. Gonna have to try and change that.

Nothing much happened on the Thursday, except for turning in my Independent Study Unit. The Friday though I went to an animation event at a French college. It was okay… It was basically learning the basics of Maya and Sculptris, as well as having a small overview of what their 3D program has. All it was for me is a refresher on how to use Maya, since it’s been a few years. 

When I arrived back at school, I watched the honour roll ceremony a little bit. I was supposed to be there, but went to the animation thing instead. I caught the teacher with the certificates though and recieved two! I got the 88% average as expected, but also had the best grade for website programming that year (95%), so that’s super cool. Didn’t expect I get the best grade in a class. I assumed maybe technology (I had 97%), but that’s hard cause you need 99% or 100% to get the best grade, because the average of that class is in the 90s (it’s an easy class). Also, I thought maybe art (I believe I had 97%), but I knew there would be one girl that would have perfect grades in that class. I didn’t even consider programming, despite doing well in it. My technology teacher (he teaches programming too) even thought programming was something I wanted to do when I was in his programming class. Now I’m kinda considering it, but the math that goes along with it doesn’t seem that great to me.

Saturday I went to do some drawing of a model. It was supposed to be nude modeling for my portfolio, but it ended up being this loosely just for fun fully clothed modeling session. In the end I couldn’t use any of that at all. I guess it was some practice, but not really. I couldn’t work on proportions cause of how loosely we were asked to work and my college wants proportions. Oh well.

Today I went to church for the first time in a while. The kids performed, which was cute. Also, there were four girls who got baptised. My mom has been asking me a lot about when I would be baptised. She’s been asking me for years, but of course being baptised is something I have to chose myself. I’ve been mostly putting it off for three reasons : shyness/social anxiety (I don’t know if I have social anxiety, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I had it; my shyness is too negative and extreme in some cases to really be shyness and not social anxiety), not knowing what to write for my testimony, and not being as strong with my faith as I want to be. The testimony thing I have a bit more confidence about. I see a lot of people asking their parent or friend to read it for them, which I might do, and I have a few ideas of what to write. However, I’ve been struggling more than ever the past couple of years with my faith. As Christians and for any other religion, we all go through our doubts which can lead to losing our faith. I don’t want to rush things and instead concentrate on strengthening my faith.

Other than that, I went Christmas shopping with my family. There was a really cute guy working there. He reminded me of a younger version of Mark Pellegrino, except skinny and with a bit of a beard. But of course, he’s most likely too old for me. If I had to guess his age, around 30. I’m bad at age guessing, but I’m pretty sure he’d be too old regardless. I also discovered the other day that someone I know who’s also 17 is dating a 23 year old guy, which to me, is not a big age gap at all. Although, I like older guys in general, so I may be biased. My mom and grandmother are cool with the idea of me dating older guys as well. I didn’t even tell them either, only after they once suggested a guy of around late twenties when I was 16. But of course, I thought they were going a bit far, since I have my limits (even if the guy was cute and I was tempted). I’m almost 18 now, so I can go for the guys I want to soon enough, but I’m still gonna stick in an reasonable age range, of course.

That’s all for today.

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