When boy asks girl to go on a hike. Girl says yes, right?
Usually, it is a no-brainer, hiking is my stress reliever, it is what I do to relax, cut loose, have some fun, and get to know a person.
But what if girl has a history with boy. And what if that history turned sour? Should girl get caught in the trap of a ‘hike’ with boy? Or would that be using boy, and she should grow a conscience and tell him she is not interested.
So I realize this is confusing, so I will provide some context:
I met Jamie on a march to Peace Arch – which is at the border of Canada and Washington State – in a demonstration to unite indigenous peoples and allies transnationally in order to protect the greater region of the Salish Sea watershed.
We gathered at Birch Bay to begin the march. The indigenous peoples led the 9 mile march up the coast. And since Jamie and I were both allies and college-aged, we got to talking. Immediately we found similarities: we both loved the outdoors, rock climbing, competitive running, and the integrity of our watershed. We hit it off and were set to become great friends. The march turned into a two-day event, bridged by a campout where we listened to tribal stories, passed around a traditional Sioux pipe, and shared in the peace that bound this group of wonderful people together.
We shared a tent that night, I didn’t bring mine, and I ended by between him and another of our friends. The next morning, we all sat on the stony beach together talking and massaging in a friendly massage train. After a day of protesting and demonstrating as water protectors, I went home expecting not to see him for some months.
But not 4 days later, he joined my environmental school club, and I suddenly had a reason to see a lot of Jamie. The next weekend I went on my first water action with him. We kayaked beside indigenous canoes to pose in front of oil tankards and to meet marchers at an oil refinery. That’s when I knew I really liked him.
The next week was midterms. And I was up to my eyeballs in studying, essay writing, and textbook readings. So the next time I saw him was studying at the waterfront park in my hammock. He joined me for JUST studying, but we ended up talking until dusk and the darkness blocked out any chances of studying.
That’s when our first kiss happened.
And it was supposed to be perfect, all of the feelings that I had been feeling where suppose to translate into this kiss. But they did not. It was a frustratingly dull and an uncomfortable dead end that I desperately wanted to get out of.
So after pure MINUTES of horrible kissing, I expertly extracted myself from the situation, made up an excuse to go home. And rushed away to my house and a bottle of mouthwash.
All of the cozy feelings of crushing on someone had vanished. And after I had to go through the conversation of ‘I don’t think I can be with you’ with Jamie, I knew that no repeats could happen. I didn’t want to hurt him more if I decided after a second attempt that I still only wanted friendship.
So now it is months later, and I’ve seen him in club, we went to an art exhibit by our mutual friend, we went Christmas caroling and went on a lovely night hike.
Now he has invited me for an all-day hike. (I should mention the hike is 2 hours 15 minutes from here — HOW DO I ESCAPE IF THINGS GET WEIRD?)
And am I leading him on, or does he realize that all I want is to be his friend and that will never change?
Sigh– Thank you for being my pages to rant on.
Signing off, until next time.