Day 670 to 674 – Funeral & last day of 2017

Sunday, December 31, 2017

My last entry of 2017!

The past five days has been pretty busy.

I went to Toronto for my great uncle’s funeral. It was nice seeing my great aunt again; she’s so sweet. The car ride was pretty crammed, since we were 3 people at the back, but I had shotgun for an hour and slept during that time. When we got there, we talked with my aunt and then went out for supper.

The morning while eating at the hotel, my mother’s cousin was there too, which I remember having went on his motorcycle with him and playing Minecraft with him. He called me and my brother the “Minecraft masters”, since he remembered too, haha.

Afterwards, we went to the funeral and I got to meet up with some cousins I haven’t seen in years, and cousins I’ve never met. One cousin I met has an incredibly beautiful face; it looks surreal, and a lot of them have cool and unique names. I met up with an old cousin that was exactly like me at her age; super into anime. She also wants to go to an art school, likes Doctor Who, Sherlock, is also a total introvert, and had more things we have in common. I ate with her at supper and we stocked up on a lot of sushi. We also talked with her family about maybe going to Japan together one day, since we both really want to visit it. My mother, grandmother and my cousin’s mother was right in saying we have so much in common, haha.

The day afterwards we went back home. Sleeping was rough for those two nights at the hotel, cause of the snoring and thick pillows that made my neck go at a 90° angle; every morning I had to take a second to let the blood flow back into my neck. Luckily, the pain would subside after a minute.

The day afterwards was pretty relaxing though. It was nice sleeping in my bed again. However, for a moment I properly thought back on the funeral, cause a friend asked why I didn’t discuss it. I explained I don’t like to discuss loss when I have a lack of remorse. I loved my great uncle of course, and being able to see him again would’ve been great, but I haven’t seen him in two years. I felt shameful and still do about it all, which is why I don’t like talking about it. Someone came up to me during the funeral and said his condolescences to me, but the thing is, even if I’m family, that man was probably suffering more than I was. I feel shameful because I’m not grieving. The only crying I’ve done was for others, such as my cousins, because I understand losing a grandfather; I’ve lost both of mine, and even if I have a biological one still alive, I’ve barely met him and I don’t consider him my grandfather, because he detached himself from everyone. Although, maybe it isn’t a totally bad thing that I’m not grieving. He’s gone, and we’ll miss him, and I wish I talked to him again, because I would’ve enjoyed it. For example, it was amazing seeing my great aunt again; I kept wanting to hug her and never let go. I’m sure I’d feel the same about him. But I believe he’s gone to heaven now, so he’s in a much better place, and all I can do now is be there for those who are grieving.

Other than that, I spent the day writing for my French project and finishing a Star Wars animation. The animation is a bit cheesy, but it works.

Today I worked again on my math project, or a little, organised some portfolio related things, talked with my grandmother and uncle who came by for supper, and that’s about it, really. It was a nice and normal day to end 2017.

I hope everyone had a wonderful 2017 and also have a wonderful 2018! I don’t have any resolutions, because I believe you should aim for goals at anytime during the year, but New Year’s is also a good time to get together and reach a goal with other people that you set for yourself that year. So strive to be the best that you can be!

That’s all for today.

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