This is my first post I felt like I needed a safe place while being anonymous to write and express my thoughts. That said let me begin.
Today was a weird day. I lost my voice over the weekend (I have Laryngitis) while visiting family and friends down south without the kids. I came home last night and slept well. I went to work for about an hour and had to come home I felt awful and slept until I picked up my kids from their dad. All day and weekend all I could think about is him. I check my email to see if he’s checked why I haven’t replied or why I haven’t said hi or to see if he’s been online and read my email from before again, but nothing. I hate that I miss him so much, I hate that I feel this way towards him when he’s not mine to miss and that’s why I haven’t replied. I need to distance myself from him. It’s not healthy for the both of us. We try and go our own way it’s been almost 2 years of going back and forth but we just cant. Im hoping this year I can separate myself from him and meet someone that will show me true love.
I hope that my divorce is finalized soon. I hate him, I never though I could possibly hate him but I do. I cant even talk to him without him getting under my skin. How can someone be so selfish? I’m trying to be and do the best I can for our kids and he’s always just angry at me.
Im so tired, so tired. Sometimes I just want to run away.