I live a double life.

Where do I start?  I’ve decided that I would start writing a public journal to share some of the crazy experiences I have had the past few years.   If cursing offends you I apologize but there will be cursing in this journal and some crazy, crude and at times disgusting details of my life.  It is what it is.  I am going to try not to filter myself too much.  I just won’t be adding pictures or names to my posts.  I’d rather keep my identity hidden.  Also for the grammar police out there I apologize to you ahead of time as well because sometimes I don’t always get it right.  When I write my book I will have an editor to do that stuff for me.  Hopefully you can get through my posts regardless if I was supposed to say you’re instead of your!! I’m sure that last sentence should have had a comma… oh well!  Blame it on my ADHD and I was a terrible student growing up.  lol

So anyway, today is January 3, 2018 and I’m starting Whole30 AND Crossfit for beginners AND I have my period.  I feel like royal shit.  I am at work and wish I could go home and crawl into my bed and sleep for like 2 days straight.    I’m eating a shit ton of healthy foods and I am hungry all the time because in order to be satisfied I need to eat enough food for like a 400 pound man.  I am stopping myself from complaining to my coworkers because who really wants to hear that anyway?  Besides my coworker is on a diet and she is eating like 4 cashews, a pickle and an avocado for lunch and is stuffed from that…so me complaining about how I’m starving an hour after eating grilled chicken, potato wedges, a cup of olives and a ton of stringbeans isn’t really gonna fly with her.   So anyway, that gives you a feel for my mindset right now.

I am going to be posting entries on the details of my experiences getting and keeping a sugar daddy and juggling being a single mom, working full time and taking care of my kids pretty much by myself.    My everyday life is VERY vanilla.  My mom friends would never guess in a million years the shit that goes down in my life after hours.  I do what I have to do to get by and take care of my kids.  PS – my ex husband is a fuckboy.  Here is a perfect example of his character, he just texted me to remind him to call our son for his birthday.  Mind you, he doesn’t help support the kids at all financially, lives out of state and doesn’t do anything as far as parenting.  He has left it all up to me… and so on top of all the things I do for our kids I need to make sure to remind HIM to call his fucking son!!  Oh and he also asked me how old HIS OWN SON is going to be.  Sorry – Ok rant over.

Journaling has been therapeutic for me and it really helps me vent, sort out my feelings and get perspective on my life.  Anyway, close friends who I have confided in tell me I need to write a book so maybe this is the beginning of one?  We shall see…

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