A Second Alone

It’s been so difficult to find My OWN TIME lately I really need to re-evaluate if this is what I want and need in my life B’a been talking down to me and thinking that Im a push around The other night we made Love for the first time in close to a year and I couldn’t get her even interested in wanting to take part I might as well have just found a Magazine and some tissues and spit one out in the Toilet , I just don’t know all she’s been talking bout is Mike and comparing me to Him FUCK HER FUCK HIM I WOULDA CHEWED THAT ROID MONKEY UP AND SPIT EM OUT LIKE YESTERDAY ‘S SLOP !! Fuckin start that shit with me .one thing I wanted to do was journal daily and get out of the house more and FIND MYSELF and what it is I wanna do in the year ahead. Didn’t start out to well spent our Methadose money $240. On dope and Booze as well as an extra $40. On heroin . Why can’t I find any of the Dope that’s killed half my Aquaintances D/ Town I’ve lost 8 close and personal friends to the Opioid epidemic and I can’t even get FUCKIN’ HIGH! This year will be a year of change I have A Denturist apartment next week to get my bottom teeth yanked and set up for Dentures, also missed my Colonoscopy Appt last month so I really need to get that looked at. Haven’t talked to my Mom in almost a year I’m at a loss for words I hope she’s doing OK I pray for her every day Love You Mom ( Still can’t understand Why ? But I do)

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