01/11/18 — Shitty Night

I was having a great day up until about 10 o’clock today. I’ve written this journal once tonight and it disappeared before I could look at it, so there’s that. I also just got an email about my paycheck for the second half of January, and I’m still being docked for absences from November and the first week of December, so my paycheck is literally $16.82. I left earlier to go return something, didn’t end up returning it because I was being a good friend for Monica, and came home at 10. Before I left I asked my stepfather to please check the dryer because it’s banging and making loud noises, and he never did. So now my clean clothes are sitting in the dryer, still wet, and the dryer has been dubbed as broken because he doesn’t know how to fix it. I had washed the clothes I was planning on wearing tomorrow and tomorrow evening. I just. I know most of this sounds trivial, but I’m literally dodging calls and receiving emails about bills that I still need to pay and can’t pay. I was denied for a loan, and anyone I talk to turns it into a competition of whose life is worse. I’m seriously just not in a good mood, and don’t have much else to say. The taco truck also didn’t put my pupusa in the bag, which was the one thing I really wanted from the truck and was the only reason I drove all the way to that particular truck. I’m just. I want to cry myself to sleep tonight because I feel like no one cares, and the person who I thought did care broke up with me two weeks ago and literally doesn’t want a) anything to do with me, b) to care about me, or c) to listen to any of my problems right now. I miss my best friend who cared for me. I still love that guy. I guess, good night and here’s to hoping for a better tomorrow. 

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