So to begin this part of my life let me fill you in on the father, like I said he was getting a divorce. We were both on the same page of not wanting something serious, which was nice. What he failed to mention was that he had a girlfriend. One who decided that because I was pregnant it was her lifes mission to make mine a living hell.
I didn’t even get to tell my daughters father that I was pregnant, my oh so kind roommate went and spilled the beans to him and his girlfriend. So right off the bat there was drama. I had to not only deal with the girlfriend, her friends, the small town gossip, but I was also going through alcohol withdrawals. So after the father found out things changed dramatically. I always thought he would always be there and be a constant support and be the dad that I knew he could be. Boy was I wrong…
So after he found out I was pregnant he stopped talking to me. His gf started calling me, texting me, showin up at my job, and driving by my house constantly running her mouth. Every time I felt like I was happy to be having a baby, she would find a way to ruin it. I cried every day over the situation. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would be bringing a baby into such a dram filled situation.
The day I found out I was having a girl I had my parents come with me to the doctors and after my mom and I went to the mall to go shopping. We barely made it into a store and ran into (literally the bitch shoulder checked me) the gfs mom and grandma. My mom threw down her purse and stuff an was ready to fight her because we were BOTH so sick of the harassment. I couldn’t go to the grocery store because she’d see my car and start circling it in the parking lot. She’d see me walking down the street and yell outta her car window that I was a “homewrecker”. It was to the point where I refused to leave my house, answer my phone, or even talk to anyone.
Fast forward to the day she was born, I had to have an emergency c-section because they had lost her heartbeat repeatedly so she was born within a matter of minutes. They tried to give me 3 epidurals all of which failed miserably, and finally had to do a spinal block. Thank God they allowed my mama in the room with me. I was so beyond nervous! Thankfully I didn’t feel one thing I was number than numb. I got to see my little glow worm for all of a minute just long enough to kiss her and see her adorable little face then they took her away and the next thing I know I had a team of nurses surrounding me with one of them rubbing my chest so hard I thought she was gonna kill me! To this day I have no idea what happened to cause all of that commotion.
I didn’t get to see my darlin girl for another 6 hours! I didn’t know how big she was, what her eyes looked like, where she was, or who she was with. They finally wheeled me to my room and I couldn’t have been happier to see my family. Everyone that I loved and cherished was there waiting for me. The best part was that my amazing mom had stayed with Grace the entire time and hadn’t left her side and she was able to get some amazing pictures for me so I didn’t “miss anything”.
During this time those people who had spent the last 9 months making my life hell no longer mattered. They weren’t even a blip on my radar. I seen this tiny little baby and the people in my room and I said to myself this is our family, this is our tribe, these are the people who will always have your back 100%. I made a promise to my darling girl that day that I would NEVER let her know or see the drama that I had to endure. I wouldn’t let her be that child that was sitting at the door for someone she didn’t know. I wouldn’t let her be used in a game of who could hurt who. It was then I realized my life had just changed….but it wasn’t done yet!