The Start of a Forever Sad Story

As a young, vulnerable junior high girl, i took a bold move. And very bold at that. I text the boy first.. the high school boy. He seemed perfect, before the text we passed each other in the hallway every day, me noticing he looking at me occasionally. But soon that was about to change.. it was about to be looking at me all the time.

He was all I could ever ask for.. and more. It seemed like things were going to be going so well at the beginning. Passing each other in the hallway he’d brush his hand along mine, soft smile with an incredibly heart melting wink. One that would send you to your knees. Well that is exactly what he wanted.. me on my knees for him, But not to beg for his love and attention. But on my knees to please him.. and not in any way an 8th grader would even be thinking about. I didn’t realize this until 3 whole years later, after giving him what he wanted too many times. But I never allowed him to take what he wanted. And it upset him, so I was only a distant memory to him for awhile.

I let this same guy continue to use my body for his own pleasure, because I felt like I was obligated to. It took me 4 years and more to stop settling for less. I need to begin to settle for what I deserve and Cole fucking Royer is not the man! He deserves the bad karma he will receive in the years ahead. I do not wish anything bad on anybody but i do believe karma will run its course. But there is nothing i can do for him but pray that God helps him grow up, and open his eyes to what he lost. Not saying I am anything special… but I wasn’t allowed to do anything that didn’t meet the standards. Pray for your sinners.

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