2/4/18 — Such a picky eater…

I really hate this aspect about myself. I’m a really picky eater. I just wish people wouldn’t flip out on me for not wanting to eat a specific food. Honestly, food is one of the biggest topics that will shoot my anxiety WAY up. Even typing this is giving me anxiety because I know people will think I’m unhealthy when I say…I only eat meat. No fruits, no vegetables, only meat products. Chicken, pork, fish. Not too much of a beef fan. Too chewy. My ideal meal is ramen noodles, pizza, and fried chicken. This is why I prefer fast food joints over any ethnic restaurant. It’s not that I hate the flavor (which in most cases I do, but that’s not the point), it’s mainly the texture of certain foods that just turn me off. For instance, spaghetti, I love the noodles, I love the sauce, I love if there are sausages in it…but I will constantly pick any and all onions, or chunks, out, because it just makes me gag trying to swallow. 

Today I hung out with two of my closest friends, Kate and Blaze (fake names). Kate’s the driver, and pansexual. Blaze is the other gay one. Anyway, I had them pick me up from my mother’s house since I had slept the night there the day after the parade. I didn’t want to be there anymore so I had my friends pick me up. We went to Kate’s house to chill for a bit before leaving and going to Ichiban, a Japanese restaurant. Me being the extremely picky eater I am had anxiety practically flooding out of me. This always happens when we eat somewhere where chicken or fries isn’t on the menu. But I did manage to find me something I liked. Thick noodles with…teriyaki chicken? I think that was teriyaki, I suck at foods I don’t usually eat. I had to tell the server to not add any of the mixed vegetables. I hated ordering because I didn’t want anyone to judge me on my food choices. But the food was good. Added some sriracha hot sauce to spice it up. I love spicy food. Another example of my pickiness: everything I eat has to be spicy. Anyways, at least the food I ate was enjoyable, and I ate nearly all of it, so that was a win for me. I just wish I wasn’t so picky with my food. I want to be able to go with my friends and eat anywhere and not have to be anxious about it.

After that we went to Books-A-Million. We bought a game of “Would You Rather” and played that for nearly two hours! Yeah, there were a lot of cards and a lot of choices to go through. After we were done, they dropped me off at home. I got bitched at by my dad. Apparently there weren’t many dirty socks or underwear for him to wash. So he started making a fuss about how I probably only wore one pair of socks and underwear. I hate how he makes it such a big deal. It’s not his clothing. He needs to lay off a little.

Anyway I’m ranting. Goodnight, journal.

8:39 PM
2/4/2018

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