unusual feelings

I do not how to feel right now because life has up and down which make everything seem so complicated but somehow I like it.  I do not find a reason why should I open my heart to someone else after you have a heart broken because all I seem to think about that every time I am in relationship, I will get hurt and been take grated for everything I am a toy. I do not how it feels to fall in love or saying that I have found my true love shit like that. I do want someone so bad but it seem so hard to find that person who just click with you and you can be yourself without feel embarrassed about it. Will I ever found a love ?

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